My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
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