she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
