I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize