Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
