Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
You were trust falling into bushes
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
