where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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