another moral hangover. fuck.
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
