hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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