um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
