I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
