Do you still have your period?
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Two words: nipple clamps
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