She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Randomize
