You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Randomize
