woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
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