If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize