He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize