I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
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