Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
