Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Randomize