How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Randomize
