Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
