if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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