I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
