I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
sex in a hospital.. check
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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