Sry I called you an 8
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
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