I can't watch pbs sober anymore
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
