Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
