After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
