RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
