Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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