Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
