I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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