I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
