the new term for farting is butt boxing.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize