flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
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