Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
How does it feel to date your dad?
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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