Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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