so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
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