Non-Jews are for practice
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
