Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
