he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
well most of my day revolves around power hour
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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