That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
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