I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Semen is not good for contacts.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
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