Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
