Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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