He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize