Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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