Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Randomize
