at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
