how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
you never un-have a 4some
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
