Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
